READING THE BIBLE-1st Kings Cptr. 2

King David's Successor: Solomon

The Legacy of Lust & Punishment of King David

Sticks & Stones May Break My Bones. . . Reading the Bible

The Christmas story - Luke Chapter 2 - in the Bible

PROPHESY OF JESUS BIRTH - 2nd Samuel

The Ark of the Covenant - Reading the Bible This Year

The Resurrection of Jesus is the Good News of the Bible

The Crucifixion of Jesus Christ - Mark Chapter 15

What does God Say about righteous Anger? Read Mark 11

Divorce - What Does God Say About it? Mark 10

The Transfiguration of Jesus Christ - Mark 9

Demons, Dogs & Deafness - Bible Discussion Today

Jesus Walks on Water - READING THE BIBLE - Mark 6

Demon-Possessed Man Gets Healed - Mark 5 - READING THE BIBLE

The Witch of Endor - READING THE BIBLE THIS YEAR

A Story About a Giant Battling a Boy - David & Goliath

Jesus and Beelzebub - READING THE BIBLE THIS YEAR

Mark Chapter 2 - Jesus Heals

Christ's Resurrection - READING THE BIBLE THIS YEAR

The Death of Jesus and Judas Hangs Himself

THE LAST SUPPER - Matthew 26 - Reading the Bible

DIVORCE-What does the Bible Say

The Supernatural Ark of the Covenant-READING THE BIBLE

The Ark of the Covenant-READING THE BIBLE

Jesus Walks on Water-Matthew 14

Curious about Demons? Join us as we Read the Bible

Forgiveness in the Bible

READING THE BIBLE - REV. 20 - SATAN'S DOOM

Hallelujah! - READING REVELATION 19

Curious What the Bible Says about Prophesy?

Reading the Bible - Revelation 17 - The Woman on the Beast

7 Angels & 7 Plagues - The Tribulation in the Bible

The Angel of the Lord at Bokim - Reading the Bible

666 - The Number of the Beast - READING THE BIBLE

Joshua's Farewell-Reading the Bible this Year

The Woman and The Dragon - READING THE BIBLE IN 1 YEAR

The Two Witnesses for God - Revelation 11

The Angel & The Little Scroll - Revelation 10

Misunderstandings Can Start Wars - Joshua Chapter 22

Cities of Refuge: Joshua Chapter 20

END of DAYS: DEMONS & DESTRUCTION

The 4 Horsemen of the Apocalypse in Revelation 5

Revelation Chapter 2 - Angels, Stars, & the Future

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Romantic Event - NOT

Okay, so we went to have our first ever “couple’s massage” last night. I was thinking that this would be a romantic splurge since we are still sore from our white-water rafting trip – I know it’s been a month – but hitting those rocks after falling out going over the waterfall is one of those things that I guess just sorta sticks it to with you.

Anyway, I occasionally get massages and usually fall asleep during the session – only to wake up in a puddle of goo because I was so relaxed I was drooling…

Not this time.

This “romantic” session was more like watching a movie with my husband – he talked through the entire session. And not just casual conversation, or “a little higher” or “a little lower”. Nope, and the session went from bad to worse in a hurry when his therapist asked, “Have you considered seeing a chiropractor?”

He, not thinking that this masseuse just might also be a licensed chiropractor, said, “OH NO! I’d never go see one of those quacks.”

I just about fell off the table and, when she gasped in outrage, I had an idea what was coming next.

My masseuse spoke up and said, “You know we share office space with those Quacks?”

He responded, “I just have to be honest.”

His masseuse asked, “How deep did you say you wanted this DEEP tissue massage?” As she must have exerted an inordinate amount of pressure on his aching back because the next thing I heard come out of my 6’4” husband’s mouth was a groan. The masseuse also said something about wanting to crawl up on his back and use her knee on him. For a second I wanted to laugh out loud but thought that wouldn’t make me look too sensitive. I also thought about trying to say something to make him seem more reasonable—but, put on the spot like that, I couldn’t think of a single thing.

At one point, I did ask if he could “keep it down a little” so I could attempt to hear the relaxing ocean simulation and soothing music but he was talking so loud, I don’t think he heard me or, if he did, he didn’t care because he just kept on talking right through our checkout to the point where I had to grab his arm and pull him out of there.

In the end, it wasn’t what I had been expecting: “no romance, no relaxation, and no sweet dreams” – in fact it was more like one of my childhood nightmares – the kind you have where you walk into a class and have to take a test—naked.

5 comments:

David Batista said...

Having never been to one of those, I have a sneaking suspicion I'd be a lot like Lars in this. OUCH!

Jen on the Edge said...

Ugh, sounds like no fun at all. So sorry it didn't work out the way you wanted.

Kimbra Kasch said...

Maybe I'm just a lot quieter than my husband ;)

I dunno - it just wasn't what I'd expected.

Brenda said...

Your experience is what I picture happening if my Hubs and I would get a romantic massage...He doesn't know how to relax and I think he would talk so much because he would be nervous...only I would tell him to "pipe down" loud enough for him to hear me...or I would request another room...grin...

Anonymous said...

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